Monday, October 28, 2013

Keeping it real

Do you ever look at the outside trappings of someone's life and think how perfect it must be?

I tend to dwell on the positive parts of my life as I write for my own reminiscence and the entertainment and edification of my readers. It occurred to me that, if you don't know me well, my life might well appear to be one long party. So, I thought I should probably interject a dose of reality, just in case I am the cause of disillusionment with your own life. 

Sometimes, I feel completely undone. 
When we love, we are vulnerable to disappointment and heartbreak, and I have been hit with a lot of it lately. I am frequently weepy and could easily dissolve into a puddle of dismal if I gave into my tender side.
Instead, I put another brick in the wall and carry on.

I wrote the former lines a few weeks ago, not knowing what was around the corner. Wasn't sure whether I should actually post it.

We had a setback last week that is going to have financial and personal repercussions for some time to come. I hate to be mysterious, but it's not just my story to tell.

It's been a rough few days. Rougher than anything in a long time. For a while, I was in despair and didn't know what I should do. I thank those of you who have been aware of our plight, who have encouraged me and prayed for us both. We are regrouping and working on a new plan. It will be hard, but we will get through it, a little sadder and much wiser.

I know we are not the only people going through trials. I have always hated the saying that goes "I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet." I feel terrible for the man with no feet. With whom does he compare himself to feel better? So I don't compare my grief or trial to yours. All we can do is support each other and share our burdens when we can. I am so grateful for family and friends who love us and whom we love in return.

Jeff asks me how I can be cheerful.
I tell him I don't know.
I blame it on my dad.
And this.

3 comments:

  1. Thank you Sue. You and me both. I've found a couple of quotes recently that are helping buoy me up... "Though we may feel like a broken vessel we must remember that vessel is in the hands of the divine potter." - Jeffrey R Holland; "I promise you that one day you will stand aside and look at your difficult times, you will realize that he was always there beside you." Pres Thomas S. Monson
    XXX Di

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  2. Thanks for being honest. I too, tend to put the good stuff out there. I also put on a happy face. Too some degree that's good, I don't want to be a downer to others, but it's also not good to make people think you always have it all together.
    I'll be praying for you.

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  3. Well, I tend to be very pessimistic but like Mari (comment above), I usually don't show it except to those who know me best. Here lately I have been very down, so many things weighing on my heart and mind, and if I did not have Erica to talk to, I don't know what I'd do. Of course we cry out to the Lord, but often we need a sympathetic ear that goes with a face we love, that we can see the compassion on. So chin up, chickie. You know where I am if there's anything I can do.

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