Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Tiers of joy

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. James Thurber.

By the end of this post, you will be forced to concede that this title is a clever one.
Yes, you will.

So, what exactly does it take to make a four-layer wedding cake, twelve hundred miles from home?

1. Five pounds of butter
2. Four dozen eggs.
3. A can of cherry pie filling.

4. Three chocolate cake mixes.

5. Half a gallon of heavy whipping cream.
6. Five pounds of flour.
7. A large amount of cocoa powder, baking chocolate, and chocolate chips.

8. Buttermilk.
9. Four pounds of sugar.

10. The well-stocked kitchen of a new friend.

12. Ten pounds of powdered sugar.

13. Some Dove Promises, lovingly shaved and applied to the bride and groom's layer. By the bride.

14. Ten hours.
15. Two more friends to shave and apply chocolate to the 12" layer. (Thank you to Shauna and Pam from my poor, cramping hands.)

16. A rag-curled princess to watch over the proceedings.

17. And a cousin of the bride to apply flowers to the assembled cake.

As the bride walked past the cake, she waved her royal hand and pronounced that it needed a big flower on top.
The task was duly accomplished, in a surprising way, which will have to be published later as I missed the photo.

The suspense is killing you, I know.


EDIT: I cropped this out of one of the official wedding photos, so it's not very good resolution. The flower on top is an ornamental kale, with a couple of roses.
Probably the only wedding cake to ever be topped with kale.
Sam's purple was gorgeous.
And one of the less unflattering photos of moi and spouse.


Thursday, December 30, 2010

Connections

This post is not funny.
I am too tired to be funny.

Our baby is married.
The marriage took place at the Newport Beach LDS temple yesterday, with a small group of family and friends. A civil ceremony and reception will be held on Saturday.
Happy and pretty.
Bethany and her new sister.
Charlie said, How come my face is so big?
Sam and her mom, Doreen.
More sisterly love.
We took everyone out to Mimi's Cafe for lunch afterwards. Mimi's is my favourite Southern California restaurant.
And, y'know, some of it had to be about me! 
Jon and Kenz. They kind of look related, don't they?
Charlie's friend, Mo, and Daniel.
Sam's sister, Janelle, and our baby.
The gratis dessert for the lovely couple tasted suspiciously liquorish, in retrospect. 
Baby Elsie pictures, just because I can.
Uncle Jon thinks he's the favourite uncle. Charlie says that's okay, because he's the favourite of the rest of the nieces and nephews. I think they are both right.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

The story of Carrot

May I introduce you to Carrot?
Lovely readers, this is Carrot.
Carrot, lovely readers.
Many years ago, before Carrot even had a name, he was an Easter gift to a youngish wife from her slightly romantic husband, Jeff.
On good days, he sat atop their nicely made bed.
On bad days, which was mostly, he languished on the floor, where he had been thoughtlessly tossed as the youngish wife crawled into bed after long days of refereeing four children.

Then, after several years of increasing prosperity, Rabbit's owners added a very tasteful storage bench to their bedroom accoutrements. It was placed at the bottom of their four-poster bed and the wife thought to herself, Self, that silly rabbit would look very nice sitting on this tasteful bench. So she retrieved him from his ignominious heap of rabbitdom on the floor and sat him in the corner of the bench.

But then she noticed, oh horror, that Rabbit was a tad crusty. On closer inspection, wife indentified it as dried milk. How dried milk had been spilt on Rabbit could hardly be imagined, unless it happened during those surreptitious forays into the under-the-bed chocolate stash. Which were always accompanied by a glass of cold milk. So wife cleaned up the old rabbit till he was as good as new and placed him lovingly on the bench.

And there he sat.
Unless he was on the floor, having been dumped, yet again, as not-so-young wife hunted for treasures in the storage bench.

Then one day, not too long ago, definitely-not-young wife decided that, sentiment aside, it was time for Rabbit to meet the Goodwill bag. So she girded her loins (wherever she could find them) and hurriedly stuffed him into the bag.

But wait, all is not lost for Rabbit!

Dum-de-dummmm!

A few days later, he was discovered by four intrepid grandchildren and gloriously named Carrot.
They played with him, fought over him, and called him by his name, over and over again.
Carrot, Carrot, Carrot!
They took him home for sleepovers.
But they always brought him back to Nana's house.
Who does not dare to ever throw him out again.

Which is kind of a happy ending for Carrot, don't you think?



Friday, December 24, 2010

Gathering the chickens

Jenny and the boys are in Utah visiting family.
Jon is working.
Sam and Charlie are dreaming of a wedding.
Well, Sam is! 
Annie and Edwin and baby Elsie will be leaving for California in a matter of hours.
The family is coming together again.

We ate stuffed pasta shells for Christmas Eve dinner with Bethany's family tonight. 
We exchanged a motley assortment of gifts.
The little darlings each got two (not one, but two!) pairs of pyjamas from Nana and Papa for Christmas. They were suitably impressed and immediately changed into them. 
Quick, photo time, I cried. Looks like good blog fodder to me!
No Nana, not about us, said Daniel.
Daniel, Nana always writes about us, said Kenzie, in a world-weary voice.

It was a challenge.





Our clever son-in-law fixed up our desk-top computer for Christmas. 
No more snail pace every time Norton is running.

And a sleek new keyboard.
We gave Chris a mop for Christmas.
It was a very nice mop.

It's a bleak mid-winter night outside....
....but here inside, the fire is quite delightful!
We'll spend tomorrow getting ready for our road trip and eating leftovers.

Merry Christmas to you, my admirable readers, and all that you love.
Stay tuned for sunny tidings.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

A little sadness in the air

I am sad to report that Bethany is no longer pregnant. We went to get an ultrasound last week and the doctor announced, rather off-handedly and with no preliminary, that there was no baby. I could have strangled him and, in retrospect, I probably should have. He wasn't sure what happened, but the baby did not develop. 

So, for the last week, Bethany has been dealing with the physical and emotional fallout from that abrupt pronouncement. She called me this morning and said Mom, I need you to come out here. It is unlike her to be demanding, so I made some calls to reschedule my appointments and off I went.

Hoo-ee, those four little darlings can wreck a house in no time at all when Mommy's feeling under the weather. I rampaged around, putting kids to work and doing laundry and feeding everybody. 

The weather outside was....delightful!

After setting the house (downstairs at least) to rights, making sure Bethany was going to survive the day, upsetting Natalie enough that she took a nap, and putting Chris to folding mounds of laundry, I headed for home. 
I brought Kenzie and Daniel with me.
They lost no time in ferreting around to see if there was anything worth mooching.
Kenzie walked out of the sewing room with a nice little journal that I've been saving for a random gift. She wanted to know where I got it. 
From the store, I answered.
Duh!
Later, I found this on my bedroom door.
What a con artist that girl has become!
So then, of course, Daniel wanted one too.
Why, I have no idea!
I told him I didn't think I had another one.


Which just goes to show how much I know!

The Friendly Beasts

Hit the play button.
Please.





Jesus, our brother, strong and good,
was humbly born in a stable rude.
And friendly beasts around him stood,
Jesus, our brother, strong and good.




"I," said the donkey, shaggy and brown,
"I carried his mother, uphill and down.
I carried his mother to Bethlehem town," 
"I," said the donkey, shaggy and brown.




"I," said the cow, all white and red,
"I gave him my manger for his bed.
I gave him my hay to pillow his head."
"I," said the cow, all white and red.




"I," said the sheep, with curly horn,
"I gave him my wool for his blanket warm.
He wore my coat on Christmas morn',"
"I," said the sheep, with curly horn.




"I," said the dove from rafters high,
"I cooed him to sleep so he would not cry..
We cooed him to sleep, my mate and I."
"I," said the dove from rafters high.



Thus all the beasts, by some good spell,
In the stable dark, were glad to tell
Of the gifts they gave Emmanuel,
Of the gifts they gave Emmanuel.



P.S. Here is a longer, but masterful, version by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Brian Stokes Mitchell.



You're welcome.