On Artlessness

I was blessed with another Joshie day today.

I love all of my grandkids.
But there's something about having Josh for the day that tugs my heartstrings.
Bearing in mind that the reason he came over was that Bethany said she couldn't stand him for one more day!
I have decided that I love his artlessness.
Definition: lack of deceit, cunning, or craftiness. Naturalness, simplicity.
He is two, going on three, and you never have to wonder what Josh is thinking or feeling.
When he's mad, he glares at you or throws things or screams.
When he's happy, he grins gleefully, like this....


And when he is here on his own with me, he is happy 100% of the time.
Except for today; he refused to speak to me for the first 30 minutes.

My feelings for Josh and the identification of the reason for them have set me to examining my own attitudes towards emotional honesty.
I like to know what I'm getting.
No false compliments for me, please.
No insincere praise.
Tell it like it is.
Or don't say anything.

The English rarely indulge in gratuitous flattery and are suspicious of those who do. I lived there for my first eleven years, which was apparently long enough to imprint my psyche. It has been a bit of a social impediment for me in these United States, where I have observed that people like to be well thought of and will often say gracious things in order to be so. I, in contrast, find it physically impossible to say one thing while thinking the polar opposite. My facial expression betrays me.
I have been quite righteously proud of this trait in myself.
No hypocrisy here!
But over the years I have learned the value of being subtle.
You don't have to lie in order to be kind.
A few friendships would have suffered less had I learned that principle at an earlier age.
So, while total lack of artifice is still my ideal, it will be tempered with some attempts at delicacy.

Disclaimer:
I hope my American readers won't abandon me for these opinions.
It is my personal experience and may not be universal.
But as I think about it, I tend to surround myself with people who will be direct and honest with me. If you know me at all, I have probably asked you at some time for the unvarnished truth. So, if you're reading this, it probably doesn't apply to you.